Laying it All Down

“What if it’s in laying it all down that we finally receive? What if it’s by surrendering that we show that we believe? What if it’s in letting go that we’re really holding on?” – Nathan Pacheco, tenor, composer, “Laying it All Down.”


I created a job for myself when I started this blog: find grace. In later age. Keep looking for it. Tell about it when I find it.


Thankfully, the more that I look for the graces in elderhood, the more I seem to find. Isn’t that just how it goes? We tend to find what we’re most earnestly looking for if we search long and hard enough? True. And these graces all seem to have something to do with coming home.


Interestingly, coming home often does mean laying things down that have kept us tied to what holds us back. Coming home usually means surrendering some – or maybe a lot – of who we’ve been and what we’ve thought is most important. Coming home can mean letting go of something that has kept us from pursuing a purpose that we’ve been given to live out. Or discovering some new and important truth.


Truth, as in: life grows short; best to make the most of it. Don’t fritter away too much of its time. Life is short; don’t take it so seriously that you forget to fritter.


Truth, as in: when you can surrender the rest of your self-doubt, your last gifts may turn out to be a blessing that you leave behind. Take up a lost joy within yourself that not only blesses you, but that also encourages those who remain – and then opulently share it.


Truth, as in: life is still a gift. Difficult, yes. That’s nothing new. It is gift to surrender any remaining battles which keep your joy from your hungry spirit, or from others.


Truth, as in: when you figure out what you need to let go, what things you can now lay down and what you are ready to surrender, you become freer than you’ve ever been.


Hold on to what sets you free.


The last surrender, the final letting go, the last laying down is yet to come for me. I’m not keeping watch for it, but I suspect that when it does arrive, I’ll find that there is much less baggage to put down.


And that is grace!


And I’m very okay with that!


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